What’s in your cup & remember how I told you high school was a bad idea?

You are holding a cup of coffee when someone comes along and bumps into you, making you spill your coffee everywhere. Why did you spill the coffee? You spilled the coffee because there was coffee in your cup. Had there been tea in your cup, you would have spilled tea. The point is whatever is inside the cup is what will spill out. Therefore, when life comes along and shakes you (which will happen), whatever is inside you will come out. It’s easy to fake it, until you get rattled. So, we have to ask ourselves, “What’s in my cup?” When life gets tough, what spills out? Joy, gratefulness, peace and humility? Or does anger, bitterness, harsh words, and reactions come out? You choose! Today let’s work towards filling our cups with gratitude, forgiveness, joy, words of affirmation, kindness, gentleness, and love for others.

Y’all. I didn’t write that above paragraph, myself. It was copied from a post I saw on Facebook. But BOY did it hit home. Did I tell you what happened to me when I went to register Miss Neenee for high school? We were inside the school. She wanted to see where her classes were. And of course I was excited to climb the stairs and walk all over kingdom come (just kidding, I was not). After my new high schooler had gotten her fill of the visions of classrooms, lockers, hall ways, & perfectly decorated bulletin boards, we headed to the car. When we walked out of the building toward the parking lot, we were greeted by 2 enthusiastic and information bearing kids.

One of the boys said to my excited new  high schooler, “Are you a trumpet player?”

In which my trumpeter replied, “Yeah.”

Then, the boy replied, “Well, your car just got hit.”

WHAT??

Evidently, I must have had that look, because here came the band director. Walking from the site of the accident toward me.

There was a short conversation between the band director & I. He briefly told me a young man accidently backed into my car. He said he the young man was very sorry & had social anxiety. Basically, the kid was afraid I was going to come out with all fists flying, pitching a dying duck dog fit about my car. I looked down the way at the worried & scared look on the boy’s face & immediately felt bad for him. I walked down to my car with my daughter following behind me. Even though this was a situation I wish I didn’t have to deal with, I thought it was a teachable moment. As I walked up & looked at the HUGE dent in my bumper,

I looked over at the boy & said, “Are you okay?” He was so nervous.

He muttered out, “Yes ma’am. I’m really sorry.”

I said, “Don’t worry about it. We can fix cars. We can’t always fix people.” I smiled at him & you could tell he felt more at ease. Now when his dad showed up, I’m not so sure what he felt. But his dad & I exchanged pleasantries and insurance information. The law showed up to make their report & as we departed the parking lot, the young man told me again he was sorry. I let him know if this was the worst thing that ever happened to him, he would be ok. Things happen.

Was this an inconvenience? Yes. Was everyone okay? Yes. Could I have showed out and acted a fool? Probably. But what good would that have done? It wouldn’t have changed the fact my car still needed repair. But, what spilled out of my cup, that time, was forgiveness, patience, & hopefully kindness. Do I always act on my best behavior? Probably not. I am human & sometimes I do say & act in a way that my mama would be ashamed of. However, I can get it together every so often, more so than on other occasions.

What’s in your cup today? Is it filled with hate, spite, & an unforgiving spirit? When you are shaken, does your cup spill out bitterness & sharp words? Or does it spill out thankfulness, compassion, & warmhearted actions?

I Peter 3: 8 Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous; (NKJV)

Are your ways prideful & judgmental? Or are they filled with mercy & grace?

Proverbs 16:18 Pride goes before destruction, And a haughty spirit before a fall.(NKJV)

Romans 14:13 Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather resolve this, not to put a stumbling block or a cause to fall in our brother’s way.(NKJV)

Since I have gotten a little older, I seem to be of the opinion, kindness needs to be deliberate & practiced ALL THE TIME. You never know what someone might be going through. And believe me I have never came across anyone without problems. You may be the only light they see in a world of gloom & doom. This world needs love. Why don’t we make an effort to show the Christ like love we would want shown to us? Life is a circle. What comes around, goes around. You get what you give out. So, next time someone gives you a short answer, just smile & kindly thank them. They may have just gotten some really bad news. Or they could just have their cup filled with some stinkin’ rotten things. Either way, your kind heart might just change their way of thinking. If not, you will be still be doing the right thing.

Like my Mamaw used to say, “Don’t act ugly.”

Y’all, can I say we have just been enjoying the fire out of Miss Neenee being in the band? This means we have a reason to go to the football games again. And boy do we love it. We did however make mention how we miss my son-in-law there. He is deployed right now. He loves sports and competition and yelling for our team. So much, that my daughter may or may not have to tell him to sit down before he gets thrown out of the game. He gets a bit riled up. And we love him for it. I hope your weather has been pleasant. Someone said fall is beginning. I’m not sure where they are, but here in northeast MS it is still HOT AS BLUE BLAZES. I hope you all have a relaxing weekend. We will be at the ballgame tonight cheering on our little trumpet player. Until next time I have to be going because I should be washing clothes.

 

Look at that game face.Almost got her to smile.Yes this is a HUGE football helmet with smoke billowing out of it. We are just fancy like that.

Football good times.

photo credits: Facebook, http://www.ellenlandreth.wordpress.com, pinterest

 

 

 

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The need to listen to the quiet and look how big my baby has got

So much of our lives are lived in big ways. When we celebrate, the bigger the better. The bigger the cake, the more confetti, the larger the spread of food, the more we care, right? And don’t forget about the present. Lord have mercy, we’ve got to have the biggest, best, most thoughtful, gift of all. The more expensive the better. If it’s not New Orleans Mardi Gras worthy, BIG, Bragadocious, & have the fireworks flying did you really even have a party?

What about if we had something small with just the kids, a birthday cake, that gets spit on while blowing out the candles & half melted ice cream? Oh and not to mention how bad it gets when we play musical chairs. Nobody. Likes. Losing. Would we still be having a party? I dare say we would. Does everything have to be big and extravagant to be something?

I have really been trying to pay attention to my One Word Focus. With that, I have realized, sometimes, blessings come without the hoopla & without the frills. Is it interesting? Nope. Is it Earth shattering & the angels opening up the heavens? Double nope. Is it so mundane that you take a second glance & say to yourself, “Is this really what this is?” Yep. Something as simple as someone calling to say, “I want to help.” Right at a time you ain’t expecting it AT. ALL. No trumpets were sounded. No mountains trembled. Nothing. Just good hearts wanting to pass along the Lord’s love.

But is it still God? Yep.

I think about Naaman. I’m not sure how much you know about Naaman, but he thought pretty highly of himself. I mean he was the commander of the army of the king of Syria. So, he was obviously hot stuff. There was just this one little thing about Naaman. He had leprosy. You would think that would be humbling enough. When he found out about the prophet Elisha being able to heal him, he just went flat out to his front door. Elisha sent a messenger out telling Naaman to go wash 7 times in the river Jordan. And apparently that took the friendly right out of Naaman because he wanted a PRODUCTION. He wanted hands waving & to be acknowledged. Not to have to get his hands dirty in the muddy river of the Jordan. But instead, he got a quiet blessing. In the murky river of the Jordan he received cleansing of his leprosy.

II Kings 5:14  So he went down and dipped seven times in the Jordan, according to the saying of the man of God; and his flesh was restored like the flesh of a little child, and he was clean.(NKJV)

Boy, don’t you know he was surprised? In his mind he thought he deserved something bigger and better. But, it’s like my daddy always says, “You better hope you don’t ever get everything you deserve.” Naaman received a quiet blessing. (II Kings 5)

All of that tells me this. We need to focus on the quietness of the Lord. We need to be thankful and appreciative of all the blessings the Lord gives us. Even when we are expecting blessings to look like something else. Just because blessings come as chocolate gravy and biscuits instead of a thick cut bone in ribeye, doesn’t mean you didn’t eat, now did it? We are important to God. Our wants and needs are important to Him. Let Him decide how to handle them. If you haven’t heard, God is always right on time.

I hope everyone has had a great week! Did anyone tell you that the kids get out of school this month? As in This. Month. I may or may not have had a little meltdown looking at pictures of my Miss Neenee to put in the yearbook. Not a fan of the growing up thing.

Here’s a picture of Miss Neenee I took last week…..

And now this……

How did this happen?

Athletic Banquet 2018

Please be in prayer for me, as I do my best to keep myself together over how my baby is starting high school in the fall. Lord have mercy. Until next time I will be going because I should be washing clothes.

Raising kids is so easy…said no one ever.

I heard someone say, not too long ago: “The hardest part of raising kids is over.  Mine are almost teenagers.”  I chuckled, a little, to myself when I heard this.  My children are 21, 20, 19, 18 & 8 years in age.  While they were younger, I was so relieved when they started walking & talking. And too, when the last one came out of diapers, I thought what will I do with all this money I will save from not buying formula & wet wipes??  Well, don’t get excited, this is not the secret to becoming a millionaire. ( I never saved any money.)  Then, they started school. What ever happened to this free education they are supposed to be getting?  I’m pretty sure I have bought enough Kleenex, Germ-X, colors, back packs, lunch boxes, etc,.. to take care of a small family.

Back to my point- I have had babies, I have had elementary school kids, I have had middle schoolers, jr. highers, high schoolers, & college kids.  The hardest part of raising kids is not while they are babies, it’s these high school graduate- college kids.  Let me explain.  With a baby, if they get in to something they aren’t supposed to, you just pick them up from where they are.  You give them something else to occupy them.  All the  while you go back & wipe up the spilled Cheerios,  pick up the magazines flung from the coffee table, clean off the wall where they were showing their creativeness with their new colors, whatever it is, it’s exhausting, but obtainable.  When they are the college age kids, they get in to something they aren’t supposed to, well, you can pick them up at the county jail, go visit them in the hospital, or basically try to rescue them from themselves.  All the while, telling them over & over until you are blue in the face, this is NOT the way.  This behavior only leads to nothingness.  But they won’t listen.  What do you do?  Seeing that since I have an expertise in these things, I will share with you my solution.

  1.   As soon as they are home from the hospital & you are able to get out of the house, take them to church as much as possible.  Keep them involved in a lot of church activities.  Make sure they all know right from wrong, at an early age.  Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it
  2. Make sure they know you love them. However, let them know obedience is key to anything in life. Ephesians 6:1 Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord.
  3. Make sure you are going to church yourself & leading a good example.  Ephesians 6:4 And you fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training & admonition of the Lord.
  4. Once you have provided the fertile soil for positive growth, have given guidance, instruction, in love, when they finish high school & reach the dreaded age of about 18, sell everything you own, buy a R.V. & set out to see the world, without them.  Otherwise, you will spend the next few years of your life in a bundle of nerves.
  5. If you decide not to purchase the R.V., then, you might want to have your doctor prescribe you a nice anti-depressant.  Because everything you have ever done wrong in your life, will come full circle & you will reap, heartily, of the bounty of crow that is set before you.  Every time you said, “My child would never ……(and finish this sentence with something seriously earth shattering), will come true before your eyes.  This is what your life will result in for the next few years.  This is the time in one of my friend’s lives that she gave me some really wonderful advice.  I won’t ever forget it.  Her son was marrying, divorcing, having kids, doing drugs, getting jobs, losing jobs, going to jail, etc.,. He was raised using the first 3 tactics above. When I asked her how she handling things & making it through, she said, “A lot of prayer & a lot of Paxil.”  I love my friend.  A lot of prayer is so vital to every aspect of life!
  6. When these kids get to acting like adults, don’t be afraid to treat them as such.  If they are old enough to make adult decisions, they are old enough to take adult responsibility.  Don’t enable.  Don’t let their actions take control of your life.  Even God lets go of people that won’t heed His will-Romans 1:28 And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a debased mind, to do those things which are not fitting.  Don’t make yourself crazy with worry over their behavior.  Pray- let go & let God handle it.  Raising kids is not for the faint of heart.  You have to be strong & have a load of self confidence, or it will really wear.you.out.

Now, don’t get me wrong, there are kids that are raised right, that stay on the right path.  And my kids aren’t the only ones that do crazy stuff.   I said that to my Daddy one day.  I asked, “What did I do wrong?  What could I have done different?”  He simply said, “Do you remember Adam & Eve? Well, God was their parent.  If He could not make His kids act right, what makes you think you can?”  Thank you Daddy, for nailing it every time.  I like to refer back to Proverbs 22:6 in hopes that one day, it will click for them.

So, the next time that toddler throws up on you, or that school age kid gets a red dot for acting bad, or that high schooler smashes their car in to something– Just remember you have a few more years until they are 18.  Then I can stand up, clear my throat & say, “Welcome to raising college age kids, we’ve been waiting for you.”  And then give a “Muuwahhaaa!!” witch like laugh.

Thank you for stopping by today.  I have loved visiting with you.  I have to be going now because I should be washing clothes.