What to do if someone is drowning & how I am getting ready for a wedding

Drowning

It has been said when rescuing someone from drowning, to approach them from the back.  Because of their panic, if you come at them from the front, they could grab you & pull you down with them. Fear & panic can cause you to think & act unwisely.

As Christians, I think this is the same thing that happens to us sometimes.   We get news that times are a changin’ & we panic.  Bless our hearts.  We start saying things that are not uplifting.  We start acting like we know it all & are sooo much better than what is going on that we forget.  We forget that we are those same sinners that need forgiveness.  Still.  Ya’ll, just because someone is different, than we are, does not give us the right to judge.  We should not spew hate.  Are we not still the same group of people that are supposed to be leading people to Jesus?  Not sending them running the other way.  We, as Christians, have such a terrific opportunity to tell others the truth about what the Bible says about sin.  Let’s not mess it up.  We need to be sure we season our words with grace.  We need to be part of the solution, not part of the problem.  I was reading in Romans 1 about what the God inspired apostle Paul said about sin.  He laid it down pretty simple about the wicked & Godless people:

Romans 1: 26-27

26 Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones. 27 In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their error.(NKJV)

But he didn’t stop there.  He also called out some other sins.

28 Furthermore, just as they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, so God gave them over to a depraved mind, so that they do what ought not to be done. 29 They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips, 30 slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents; 31 they have no understanding, no fidelity, no love, no mercy. 32 Although they know God’s righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice them.(NKJV)

This covers about every sin there is.  He went from one end of the spectrum of envy & murder all the way to being unloving.  Did you notice he mentioned, disobeying parents & gossiping?

gossip

Do you know anyone that’s guilty of that?  Do you know anyone who gossips or stands by & listens to another person gossiping?  Ouch!  That hits close to home.  It’s sin, just like being a homosexual or murderer, according to the passage above.

The scripture goes on to say in Romans 2:

Therefore you are inexcusable, O man, whoever you are who judge, for in whatever you judge another you condemn yourself; for you who judge practice the same things. But we know that the judgment of God is according to truth against those who practice such things. And do you think this, O man, you who judge those practicing such things, and doing the same, that you will escape the judgment of God? (NKJV)

The apostle Paul was talking to the church at Rome.  Christians that were passing judgment on those around them for their sins.  He was telling them they should not be judging others, because they too, were sinners.  We are taught the ONLY judgment we can speak of is a righteous judgment.

John 7:24 Do not judge according to appearance, but judge with righteous judgment.”

I read an article the other day written by a person who was an active member of a church.  However, is not now.  He said a secret about a lot of people professing Christianity is that they don’t read their Bibles.  Oh they attend every service, warm their pew, give of their means, & sing loud.  But when they are faced with sin, they start going along with the crowd.  They agree to whatever the Christians are saying.  However, never opening their Bibles to see what God is really saying.

Listen folks, don’t take someone else’s word for what God’s commandments are. Make sure you know.  You are the only one responsible for you.

Philippians 2:12 Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling;(NKJV)

II Timothy 2:15 Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.(KJV)

Timothy

I hope everybody has been having a good week.  It has been hot here & you know what?  That’s what it’s supposed to be for July in Mississippi.  But we are still just complaining away.  Now don’t that beat all?  At least it will hopefully not be SO hot when my daughter gets married this fall.  I wonder if there is a way to look at the weather, that far in advance?We want some good weather so that everybody will be comfortable for an outside wedding & what have you.  Until next time, I pray you will stay out of the heat.  I will perhaps be sitting under the air conditioner, staying cool, while watching way too many episodes of “Say Yes To The Dress”.  HEY, we have got to do our research here.  And of course I will do all of this while I should be washing clothes.

biscuit love

Credits: Our Daily Bread, patheos, a happy lass, pinterest

 

What I know about raising kids & why it’s good to have a strong will

Me & my partner in (raising kids) crime

Me & my partner in (raising kids) crime

 

There are few fields I am an expert in.  One thing I do have experience in, possibly not an expert in, is raising kids.  The Lord blessed me with 5 kids.  Three are my step kids.  At this point in my life & theirs, we don’t even really like to acknowledge they are not my own.  Reason being is that I see no difference in them & my own two.  Strange how years of being right there for everything makes me feel like we are more blood than not.   My last baby did tie all the kids together with having a sister.  I pity the person that refers to her as their half sister.  They will tell you, real quick she is their real sister.  Nothing half about none of that.  People rave at the resemblance of me & my two step daughters.  We just laugh quietly to ourselves, hardly ever admitting we were bound by anything else other than genetics.  My husband & I have been married for 15 years this year.  So, we have all put our time in, together, to make this blended family what it is today.  The youngest, which will be 20 her birthday, had just turned 5 when I became her step mama.  She doesn’t remember when me & her daddy were not together.  Along with my son, for years, we had 4 kids like stair steps.  It does not seem like that long ago, that they were in kindergarten, 1st grade, 2nd grade, & 3rd grade.  Now, I have grandbabies.  Time stops for no one.  Have times always been candy canes & fluffy clouds?  No.  Have I learned something about kids during this time?  You bet your bottom dollar.  That is why I feel so strongly about young people & the direction some of them are taking today.

I watched parts of an episode on Dr. Phil last week.  It was a teenage girl, that is from a nearby town.  Evidently, she was reeking havoc on her mom.  She smoked dope, drank, was actively having sex with a boy over 18, kicked her mama’s windshield out of her car, shoplifted, & various other things, that I may have not caught.  Dr. Phil was trying to counsel her.  He asked her why she shoplifted.  She said it was the people she was with & that if her mama had of given her money, she would not have had to. Come to find out her mama had given her $800 for clothes & she spent it all.  Now, let’s stop right there.  My 19 year old, knows this girl.

She said, “Who gives their kid $800 to spend on clothes?” 

She was amazed & perplexed at this.  She said this because, brace yourself , we did not give our kids wardrobe money.  It’s not that we hated our kids, or that we did not want them to be able to go out & buy whatever their hearts desired.  I felt it my duty, as a mother, to be a part of the clothes buying process.  Have you seen some of the stuff these girls wear these days, in the name of trends & fashion?  Between me & their grandmother, we made it our job to keep them in modest clothing.  Today, as young ladies, my two oldest daughters dress appropriately.  Why?  Perhaps because as teenagers, they had to pass by their Daddy’s recliner, as they made their way out the door.  He would stop them in an instant & send them back to their room to cover up whatever it was that needed it.  Now, did they stay covered up after they left the house?  I don’t know because I wasn’t always with them.  However, they knew what the right thing was.

I will give you my best shot at telling you what I believe is going on with some of these young kids, these days.  Why the rebellion & the acting out some kids do in the name of trying to get attention?  First off, many parents do not want to parent.  They want to be their kid’s friend.  Why you may ask?  Because parenting done right, is hard.  It’s exhausting & tiring & a headache.  Sometimes you feel like you are fighting a battle.  Who wants to fight a battle, if you don’t have to?  You have to have a lot of self confidence & conviction in you to stand up to a 16 year old boy, who is already a head taller than you.  And to tell him, in no uncertain terms he is NOT taking your car out, because he made the bad choice to not study & make a less than stellar grades on his report card.  No matter how much he wants to huff & puff, he ain’t blowin’ my house down.  (Whew! I think this just got personal.) All that strong will, I have always had, would be mush if I did not use it for the good of my kids.  Many parents today are afraid of making their teenage kids mad.  You know what?  I was never inclined to “pacify” my kids.  They knew how I felt & what I believed to be right, good, bad or indifferent.  Sometimes, you could cut the tension with a knife.  But I was never miserable in my own house.

Thus the passive parenting begins.  The path of least resistance.  A parent has to have their stuff together, to pass that along to a child.  So many parents are off chasing a rabbit.  They, themselves are not growing up.  They are still partaking in things of the world that is not good.  Parents of children are on drugs, taking alcohol to the extreme, involved in unhealthy relationships & barely able to take care of their own basic needs.  A person has to be serious about this parenting thing or you are setting yourself up for disaster with your kids.  Kids are very monkey see, monkey do.  It they don’t see the mama & daddy monkey with it together, chances are, they are going to follow suit.  If the mama & daddy aren’t going to church & don’t care about the Lord, don’t be surprised that the kids aren’t going to be that interested either.  And who’s to blame there?  Not the kids.

Now, saying all of that, can you do your very best to do everything within your power for the good of you kids & your kids still turn from the way?  Well yeah.  Kids are free moral agents.  They have a mind of their own.  You & your household is not their only influence.  Does that release you of your responsibility of doing your part to raise a child to not be a menace to society?  I think not.  It’s our whole duty to give it our best shot.  You can’t make me believe that even the ones that go astray don’t have the solid seed of the Lord planted deep down in their soul.  We have to pray that they will come back.  We must stay on the straight & narrow path ourselves.   Some good advice my aunt gave me-

“Your kids ain’t ever gonna do exactly like you think they should.” 

(so quit with the wringing of the hands & worrying.)

& another wise woman said,

 “You can’t let your kids run your house.”

 Oh how true.  I am not going to live in a house where everything revolves around the kids.  I love my kids more than life itself.  Too much to let them go out in the world with the false sense of believing they are so special they are not responsible for their actions.  Letting them live in a kingdom, in which they rule, is a recipe for disaster.  Especially the reality check they will get when they step out on their own in the world & realize they are not the center of the universe.

My Daddy told me one time when I went to him for advice about kids,

“Do you think you are better than God?   Look at Adam & Eve.  Even God had problems with His kids.”

So, don’t beat yourself up too bad, when kids get on the wrong path.  Pray & let God handle it.

Here is what Solomon said about raising kids- (remember when God was handing out wisdom, He gave Solomon an extra helping of wisdom – just because he asked for it.)

Proverbs 22:6 –  Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it. (NKJV)

Proverbs 22:15 –  Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of correction will drive it far from him. (NKJV)

Proverbs 23:13 –  Do not withhold correction from a child, For if you beat him with a rod, he will not die.

Proverbs 29:15 –  The rod and rebuke give wisdom, But a child left to himself brings shame to his mother.

Just to clarify- these last verses have things about beating with a rod.  I don’t believe in child abuse.  I don’t think that’s what King Solomon was saying.  I do believe in getting a child’s attention when they do wrong.  Whether it takes a belt or time out.  Each child is different.  One of my sons would not straighten up until my husband got his belt out.  My youngest daughter, I believe we could have beat her to death & she would have still been doing what we told her not to.  She got lots of time outs.  That’s what worked on her.  The main thing is correction & consistency.

Granted my kids are not perfect.  I was not a perfect parent. I did faithfully take them to church & involve them in lots of church activities. They are all Christians, they work, & provide for themselves & their families.  They are God-fearing.  I just don’t know if I could ask for anything more.  I am proud of each & every one of them.  And we still have Miss Neenee at home with us.  There is still time for improvement!

I am so glad you stopped by to visit with me today.  Sorry if I got on a bit of a tangent.  I do hope you took something positive away from all this.  Don’t take raising kids lightly!  When they are grown, you will be glad you put the time in!  I hope you have a great rest of the week. This weekend I will be doing a 5k at Woodall Mountain.  Pray for me that I don’t pass out. 🙂  Until then, I have to be going because I should be washing clothes.

My kids & kids in law (minus my son)

My kids & kids in law (minus my son)